Holmes Minor

Now, last time we were lent Mr. Holmes’ telescope. This time, Mrs. Frankles has used her contacts to supply us with another interesting object: Dr George Merryweather’s Tempest Prognosticator!

Though it never went into full production, I believe it was shown at the Great Exhibition of 1851 to much excitement. It is a form of barometer to warn when a storm is coming, and we have been allowed to keep it for the month to study it and to use it for creative stimulation.

Would you like to explain more, Mrs. Frankles...? These twelve bottles at the bottom for instance—what do they contain?

I’m sorry, did you say “leeches”?

And they do what, dear? Climb up the bottle when a storm threatens and set off a bell?

Where did you hear about this again? Via a… tumbler. Was it full of gin, by chance?

(Great heavens…) Anyway, they’re here now and we must be thoughtful towards our guests. What do leeches eat, Mrs. Frankles? Oh, they don’t need to be fed for at least another month! Pity. I was thinking Mr. Holmes might have been of some use for once…

But please, everyone, gather forward and examine this fascinating device.



As added inspiration here is a quotation from Dr. Watson’s story, “The Adventure of the Golden Pince-Nez”:


As I turn over the pages I see my notes upon the repulsive story of the red leech and the terrible death of Crosby the banker.



Here as usual is the list of poetry forms:

221B verselet, abecedarian poetry, acrostic poetry, alexandrine, ballad, barzelletta, beeswing, blackout poetry, blitz poem, blues stanza, bref double, Burns stanza, call and response, chastushka, cherita, cinquain, circular poetry, clerihew, clogyrnach, colour poems, compound word verse, concrete poetry, Cornish verse, curtal sonnet, débat, décima, descort, diamante, doggerel, double dactyl, echo verse, ekphrasis, elegiac couplet, elegiac stanza, elfje, englyn, enuig, epigram, epistle, epitaph, epulaeryu, Etheree, fable, Fib, florette, found poetry, free verse, ghazal, haiku, hay(na)ku, In Memoriam stanza, Italian sonnet, jueju, kennings poem, lanturne, lies, limerick, line messaging, list poem, lyric poetry, mathnawī, micropoetry, mini-monoverse, musette, nonsense verse, palindrome poetry, pantoum, Parallelismus Membrorum, poem cycle, puente, quatern, quintilla, renga, rhyming alliterisen, riddle, rimas dissolutas, rime couée, rispetto, Schüttelreim, sedoka, septet, sestina, shadorma, sonnet, stream of consciousness, tanka, tercet, terza rima, tongue twister poetry, triangular triplet, tricube, trine, triolet, Tyburn, villanelle, xenolith

And so, let us talk about the weather!

Things are starting to look a little brighter, but we mustn’t let our guard down and we still have to maintain the social distancing. But there are ways of communicating from a safe distance and I thought we could try one of them. I have already passed out the necessary equipment—yes, today we will be learning the language of fans!

What’s that, Mrs. Frankles? Yes, indeed, the language of fans is generally considered to be a flirtatious one. But I think we can expand it to other areas. Simply flirting with each other doesn’t sound very interesting to me—indeed, I myself am impervious to flirting and—

Hmm, Mrs. Frankles?

Yes, I suppose that is quite sensible of me… You really think it shows great intelligence too? And wisdom? Oh, that’s— And what, this dress? I’m really pleased you think it’s a good choice and that the colour flatters me. That’s so kind. Oh dear, I rather think I’m perhaps blushing just a little—

Oh.

Yes, thank you, Mrs. Frankles. I think you’ve made your most amusing point. Please keep your shop assistant’s wiles to yourself in future.



So! Here is a list of possible permutations of the fan and their associated meanings.



You can keep to those or invent some of your own. To inspire you in the code of fans and also in the writing of poetry, here is a quotation from Dr. Watson’s retelling of Mr. Holmes’ story, “The Adventure of the Gloria Scott”:


”He must have misread it. If so, it must have been one of those ingenious secret codes which mean one thing while they seem to mean another.”



Here as usual is the list of poetry forms:

221B verselet, abecedarian poetry, acrostic poetry, alexandrine, ballad, barzelletta, beeswing, blackout poetry, blitz poem, blues stanza, bref double, Burns stanza, call and response, chastushka, cherita, cinquain, circular poetry, clerihew, clogyrnach, colour poems, compound word verse, concrete poetry, Cornish verse, curtal sonnet, débat, décima, descort, diamante, doggerel, double dactyl, echo verse, ekphrasis, elegiac couplet, elegiac stanza, elfje, englyn, enuig, epigram, epistle, epitaph, epulaeryu, Etheree, fable, Fib, florette, found poetry, free verse, ghazal, haiku, hay(na)ku, In Memoriam stanza, Italian sonnet, jueju, kennings poem, lanturne, lies, limerick, line messaging, list poem, lyric poetry, mathnawī, micropoetry, mini-monoverse, musette, nonsense verse, palindrome poetry, pantoum, Parallelismus Membrorum, poem cycle, puente, quatern, quintilla, renga, rhyming alliterisen, riddle, rimas dissolutas, rime couée, rispetto, Schüttelreim, sedoka, septet, sestina, shadorma, sonnet, stream of consciousness, tanka, tercet, terza rima, tongue twister poetry, triangular triplet, tricube, trine, triolet, Tyburn, villanelle, xenolith


And so on to discreet and distanced communication!

Welcome, everyone! I thought for easing into this new year we could have an evening of singing parlour songs together, which might lead into inspiring you to come up with your own. Sentimental… stirring… amusing… What’s that, Mrs. Frankles? Yes, “ribald,” is a possibility too.

To get things started I thought I would play a favourite love song of mine on the gramophone. “Love’s Old Sweet Song” by James Molloy, sung and played by Professor Derek B. Scott of the department of Critical Musicology, University of Leeds.


Let me just set the needle on the record…


Oh, lovely. Now do feel free, everyone, to rummage through my record collection to get more inspiration.



And here is a quotation to assist you from Dr. Watson’s story “The Adventure of the Retired Colourman”:


”Well, leave it there, Watson. Let us escape from this weary workaday world by the side door of music.”



Here as usual is the list of poetry forms:

221B verselet, abecedarian poetry, acrostic poetry, alexandrine, ballad, barzelletta, beeswing, blackout poetry, blitz poem, blues stanza, bref double, Burns stanza, call and response, chastushka, cherita, cinquain, circular poetry, clerihew, clogyrnach, colour poems, compound word verse, concrete poetry, Cornish verse, curtal sonnet, débat, décima, descort, diamante, doggerel, double dactyl, echo verse, ekphrasis, elegiac couplet, elegiac stanza, elfje, englyn, enuig, epigram, epistle, epitaph, epulaeryu, Etheree, fable, Fib, florette, found poetry, free verse, ghazal, haiku, hay(na)ku, In Memoriam stanza, Italian sonnet, jueju, kennings poem, lanturne, lies, limerick, line messaging, list poem, lyric poetry, mathnawī, micropoetry, mini-monoverse, musette, nonsense verse, palindrome poetry, pantoum, Parallelismus Membrorum, poem cycle, puente, quatern, quintilla, renga, rhyming alliterisen, riddle, rimas dissolutas, rime couée, rispetto, Schüttelreim, sedoka, septet, sestina, shadorma, sonnet, stream of consciousness, tanka, tercet, terza rima, tongue twister poetry, triangular triplet, tricube, trine, triolet, Tyburn, villanelle, xenolith


All right, I believe Mrs. Frankles has now volunteered to sing “A LIfe on the Ocean Wave” for us…? Off you go then, dear. Do try not to go “overboard”!

Yes.

(Good luck, everyone…)

Is everyone here now…? Ah, excellent.

So, thank you everyone for joining me up here in the largest lumber room. You may be wondering why we’re gathered in this particular room but I chose this meeting place for good reason. It is where Mr. Holmes stores his many disguises, and I thought for today’s entertainment we could have a go at doing some dressing up of our own!

We have Mr. Holmes’s full permission as long as we are careful. Now, let me see…

Here is Mr. Holmes’s “rude sailor dress”—yes, we can do without the giggling, thank you, Mrs. Frankles—with the pea-jacket, from his Sign of Four adventure…

...his groom and clergyman’s costumes from A Scandal in Bohemia…

...his Italian priest disguise from when he had to leave for Switzerland—yes, sad times indeed…

...but here is his bookseller’s guise from when he returned three years later! And still with the blood stains from the doctor thumping him in the face with his own copy of “British Birds”! Yes…

Moving swiftly on—their evening wear and black silk masks from their… alleged… visit to Charles Augustus Milverton…

And Mr. Holmes’s old lady frock from his successful retrieval of the Mazarin stone!

And there are other outfits from other, told and untold, adventures—do have a rummage and see what you can come up with!


Hopefully this will give you some poetic inspiration. And to add to that, let me remind you of Mr. Holmes’s statement from “The Hound of the Baskervilles”, faithfully recorded by Dr. Watson:


”My eyes have been trained to examine faces and not their trimmings. It is the first quality of a criminal investigator that he should see through a disguise.”



Here as usual is the list of poetry forms:

221B verselet, abecedarian poetry, acrostic poetry, alexandrine, ballad, barzelletta, beeswing, blackout poetry, blitz poem, blues stanza, bref double, Burns stanza, call and response, chastushka, cherita, cinquain, circular poetry, clerihew, clogyrnach, colour poems, compound word verse, concrete poetry, Cornish verse, curtal sonnet, débat, décima, descort, diamante, doggerel, double dactyl, echo verse, ekphrasis, elegiac couplet, elegiac stanza, elfje, englyn, enuig, epigram, epistle, epitaph, epulaeryu, Etheree, fable, Fib, florette, found poetry, free verse, ghazal, haiku, hay(na)ku, In Memoriam stanza, Italian sonnet, jueju, kennings poem, lanturne, lies, limerick, line messaging, list poem, lyric poetry, mathnawī, micropoetry, mini-monoverse, musette, nonsense verse, palindrome poetry, pantoum, Parallelismus Membrorum, poem cycle, puente, quatern, quintilla, renga, rhyming alliterisen, riddle, rimas dissolutas, rime couée, rispetto, Schüttelreim, sedoka, septet, sestina, shadorma, sonnet, stream of consciousness, tanka, tercet, terza rima, tongue twister poetry, triangular triplet, tricube, trine, triolet, Tyburn, villanelle, xenolith


So, do feel free to start selecting your outfits! Mr. Holmes did just request that we keep out of the corsets but otherwise– Oo, dibs on the acid green evening dress! I’m going to have to hitch up about six inches of skirt but what the heck...

Thank you everyone for joining me at this small cocktail soirée outside under the plane tree! There are plenty of refreshments and I hope later everyone will take their turn at singing for us—I believe Mrs. Small-Hobbit has brought her banjo!

But the main reason I have arranged this get-together is to illustrate and celebrate one of my greatest passions—

What’s that, Mrs. Frankles?

Yes, I suppose gin is one of my passions but I really meant—

Oh, I see! Yes, do top me up, dear, now you’ve brought the bottle over.

Now, where was I? Ah, yes. The passion I’m talking about is friendship. That wonderful support in difficult times. Where would we be without it?



Let me just add here Mr. Holmes’s written record of Mr. James M. Dodd’s eloquent words, from his piece “The Blanched Soldier”:


We formed a friendship—the sort of friendship which can only be made when one lives the same life and shares the same joys and sorrows.


Perhaps this might spark some ideas for poems and songs for our gathering.


Here as usual is the list of poetry forms:

221B verselet, abecedarian poetry, acrostic poetry, alexandrine, ballad, barzelletta, beeswing, blackout poetry, blitz poem, blues stanza, bref double, Burns stanza, call and response, chastushka, cherita, cinquain, circular poetry, clerihew, clogyrnach, colour poems, compound word verse, concrete poetry, Cornish verse, curtal sonnet, débat, décima, descort, diamante, doggerel, double dactyl, echo verse, ekphrasis, elegiac couplet, elegiac stanza, elfje, englyn, enuig, epigram, epistle, epitaph, epulaeryu, Etheree, fable, Fib, florette, found poetry, free verse, ghazal, haiku, hay(na)ku, In Memoriam stanza, Italian sonnet, jueju, kennings poem, lanturne, lies, limerick, line messaging, list poem, lyric poetry, mathnawī, micropoetry, mini-monoverse, musette, nonsense verse, palindrome poetry, pantoum, Parallelismus Membrorum, poem cycle, puente, quatern, quintilla, renga, rhyming alliterisen, riddle, rimas dissolutas, rime couée, rispetto, Schüttelreim, sedoka, septet, sestina, shadorma, sonnet, stream of consciousness, tanka, tercet, terza rima, tongue twister poetry, triangular triplet, tricube, trine, triolet, Tyburn, villanelle, xenolith


So please join me now in raising a glass:

To friendship!

We might still be temporarily marooned here on the Isle of Wight at Osborne House but at least the quarantine restrictions have lifted a little. And so today we will be taking the ‘bus to Ryde and having a picnic on the beach!

Mrs. Small-Hobbit has been out to purchase a few essentials. Bread. Cheese. Cakes. A… case of red wine... And Mrs. Frankles has assisted me in putting together a splendid hamper of comestibles.

If everyone could put their face masks into place? Then we can set off to the stop. And while waiting for the ‘bus, perhaps everyone could consider this quotation as inspiration for your poems. It’s from Doctor Watson’s story “The Adventure of Charles Augustus Milverton”:


“Excellent. And a mask?” “I can make a couple out of black silk.” “I can see that you have a strong natural turn for this sort of thing. Very good; do you make the masks…” With our black silk face-coverings, which turned us into two of the most truculent figures in London, we stole up to the silent, gloomy house.


Ah, Doctor Watson! Full of the most unexpected of skills, bless him.



Here as well is the usual list of poetry forms:

221B verselet, abecedarian poetry, acrostic poetry, alexandrine, ballad, barzelletta, beeswing, blackout poetry, blitz poem, blues stanza, bref double, Burns stanza, call and response, chastushka, cherita, cinquain, circular poetry, clerihew, clogyrnach, colour poems, compound word verse, concrete poetry, Cornish verse, curtal sonnet, débat, décima, descort, diamante, doggerel, double dactyl, echo verse, ekphrasis, elegiac couplet, elegiac stanza, elfje, englyn, enuig, epigram, epistle, epitaph, epulaeryu, Etheree, fable, Fib, florette, found poetry, free verse, ghazal, haiku, hay(na)ku, In Memoriam stanza, Italian sonnet, jueju, kennings poem, lanturne, lies, limerick, line messaging, list poem, lyric poetry, mathnawī, micropoetry, mini-monoverse, musette, nonsense verse, palindrome poetry, pantoum, Parallelismus Membrorum, poem cycle, puente, quatern, quintilla, renga, rhyming alliterisen, riddle, rimas dissolutas, rime couée, rispetto, Schüttelreim, sedoka, septet, sestina, shadorma, sonnet, stream of consciousness, tanka, tercet, terza rima, tongue twister poetry, triangular triplet, tricube, trine, triolet, Tyburn, villanelle, xenolith


And here we go. Off to Ryde Sands!

Hello everyone and welcome once again!

We are in February—a month associated with St. Valentine’s Day and thus with romance. And the heart motif in jewellery is rather popular in general at this current time.

So this month we are going to an exhibition of contemporary jewellery that uses this particular motif, hosted by Victoriana Magazine!


As extra inspiration for your poems, here is a classic quotation from Dr. Watson’s story “The Adventure of the Devil’s Foot”:


“Upon my word, Watson!” said Holmes at last with an unsteady voice, “I owe you both my thanks and an apology. It was an unjustifiable experiment even for one's self, and doubly so for a friend. I am really very sorry.”

“You know,” I answered with some emotion, for I have never seen so much of Holmes's heart before, “that it is my greatest joy and privilege to help you.”



And here is the usual list of poetry forms:

221B verselet, abecedarian poetry, acrostic poetry, alexandrine, ballad, barzelletta, beeswing, blackout poetry, blitz poem, blues stanza, bref double, Burns stanza, call and response, chastushka, cherita, cinquain, circular poetry, clerihew, clogyrnach, colour poems, compound word verse, concrete poetry, Cornish verse, curtal sonnet, débat, décima, descort, diamante, doggerel, double dactyl, echo verse, ekphrasis, elegiac couplet, elegiac stanza, elfje, englyn, enuig, epigram, epistle, epitaph, epulaeryu, Etheree, fable, Fib, florette, found poetry, free verse, ghazal, haiku, hay(na)ku, In Memoriam stanza, Italian sonnet, jueju, kennings poem, lanturne, lies, limerick, line messaging, list poem, lyric poetry, mathnawī, micropoetry, mini-monoverse, musette, nonsense verse, palindrome poetry, pantoum, Parallelismus Membrorum, poem cycle, puente, quatern, quintilla, renga, rhyming alliterisen, riddle, rimas dissolutas, rime couée, rispetto, Schüttelreim, sedoka, septet, sestina, shadorma, sonnet, stream of consciousness, tanka, tercet, terza rima, tongue twister poetry, triangular triplet, tricube, trine, triolet, Tyburn, villanelle, xenolith


With all my heart, I hope that you’ll join me. And so to the bus stop!

Hello everyone! Mrs. Small-Hobbit and Mrs. Frankles have requested that I host a combined activity and poetry page for December, and indeed I am delighted to do so.

Mrs. Frankles also suggested that I borrow a tradition from our neighbours in the Netherlands. She was speaking of “Pakjesavond” which is celebrated on the 5th of December, the eve of the feast of St. Nicholas—or Sinterklaas, as the Dutch call him.

It goes like this: everyone is allotted one person to buy a gift for, and they must also write a poem about that person—the poem can send up the person rather! The gift must be concealed in a cardboard model, which again must relate to the recipient in some way—something to do with their job or their interests. The Dutch call the models “surprises”, which is from the French and pronounced “sur-prees-suhs”.


You can see some excellent examples of these surprises in this article.


Now, naturally we do not expect you to actually buy a gift and make a surprise. But we would like you to pick someone out of everyone Dr. Watson has written about—that includes Mr. Holmes and the doctor himself, and indeed me—and think of:


a suitable gift

a suitable surprise

and write a poem about them


Though you don’t have to do all three options yourself! You can choose to do just one or two of them. Mrs. Small-Hobbit has suggested that you label your comment with the name of your “recipient”, then if you haven’t filled in all the options, other participants can reply to your comment with their thoughts. Or even suggest alternatives!

Feel free to be as wildly creative about these gifts as you like. And the poem can be a simple piece of doggerel but if you are feeling more ambitious, here is the usual list of poetry forms:

221B verselet, abecedarian poetry, acrostic poetry, alexandrine, ballad, barzelletta, beeswing, blackout poetry, blitz poem, blues stanza, bref double, Burns stanza, call and response, chastushka, cherita, cinquain, circular poetry, clerihew, clogyrnach, colour poems, compound word verse, concrete poetry, Cornish verse, curtal sonnet, débat, décima, descort, diamante, doggerel, double dactyl, echo verse, ekphrasis, elegiac couplet, elegiac stanza, elfje, englyn, enuig, epigram, epistle, epitaph, epulaeryu, Etheree, fable, Fib, florette, found poetry, free verse, ghazal, haiku, hay(na)ku, In Memoriam stanza, Italian sonnet, jueju, kennings poem, lanturne, lies, limerick, line messaging, list poem, lyric poetry, mathnawī, micropoetry, mini-monoverse, musette, nonsense verse, palindrome poetry, pantoum, Parallelismus Membrorum, poem cycle, puente, quatern, quintilla, renga, rhyming alliterisen, riddle, rimas dissolutas, rime couée, rispetto, Schüttelreim, sedoka, septet, sestina, shadorma, sonnet, stream of consciousness, tanka, tercet, terza rima, tongue twister poetry, triangular triplet, tricube, trine, triolet, Tyburn, villanelle, xenolith



Ik wens jullie allemaal een vrolijke Pakjesmaand!

Welcome everyone, and thank you for joining me here!

Life can of course can be a serious business and this is often reflected in our choice of pose when we have photographs taken.

However, this month we are at an exhibition of photographs showing the lighter side of life—with people around the world smiling, laughing and being generally silly.

If you would like to follow me into the exhibition room…

Lovely. I think there may be a lot of inspiration for poems here. And as added inspiration, here is a quotation from Dr. Watson’s story 'The Red-headed League':



All the afternoon he sat in the stalls wrapped in the most perfect happiness, gently waving his long, thin fingers in time to the music, while his gently smiling face and his languid, dreamy eyes were as unlike those of Holmes the sleuth-hound, Holmes the relentless, keen-witted, ready-handed criminal agent, as it was possible to conceive.



And here are the usual suggestions for poetry forms:


221B verselet, abecedarian poetry, acrostic poetry, alexandrine, ballad, barzelletta, beeswing, blackout poetry, blitz poem, blues stanza, bref double, Burns stanza, call and response, chastushka, cherita, cinquain, circular poetry, clerihew, clogyrnach, colour poems, compound word verse, concrete poetry, Cornish verse, curtal sonnet, débat, décima, descort, diamante, doggerel, double dactyl, echo verse, ekphrasis, elegiac couplet, elegiac stanza, elfje, englyn, enuig, epigram, epistle, epitaph, epulaeryu, Etheree, fable, Fib, florette, found poetry, free verse, ghazal, haiku, hay(na)ku, In Memoriam stanza, Italian sonnet, jueju, kennings poem, lanturne, lies, limerick, line messaging, list poem, lyric poetry, mathnawī, micropoetry, mini-monoverse, musette, nonsense verse, palindrome poetry, pantoum, Parallelismus Membrorum, poem cycle, puente, quatern, quintilla, renga, rhyming alliterisen, riddle, rimas dissolutas, rime couée, rispetto, Schüttelreim, sedoka, septet, sestina, shadorma, sonnet, stream of consciousness, tanka, tercet, terza rima, tongue twister poetry, triangular triplet, tricube, trine, triolet, Tyburn, villanelle, xenolith