[identity profile] okapi1895.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] holmes_minor
Title: August by I. Quill
Length: 500
Rating: Gen
Summary: When Jamrach & co. have Inky and Ferret trapped, it’s time for a little improvisation.
Author’s Note: Inspired by today’s solar eclipse.



Somewhere clock ticked loudly. Too loudly. Or maybe it was my heart.

“So this is how it ends. Ouch!”

“Now’s not the moment to be fatalistic, Ferret! Sorry.”

We were huddled together, well, as much as my quills allowed, beneath the legs of the large wooden chair.

“Really? Jamrach and two of his most unpleasant associates have us quite literally backed into a corner! Three rifles are trained on us! Where, pray tell, dear Inky, is the silver lining?”

“I’VE GOT YOU NOW, THIEVING VERMIN!” growled my nemesis, he who bore the dubious distinction of being the most prolific of all the London traders in animals some called exotic, but I called my friends.

“How very prosaic, indeed, unoriginal. But perhaps our silver lining,” I said, considering the dark curtain hung before the window, which we’d drawn in hopes that the cover of darkness would give us an advantage over our adversaries, “is, in truth, a corona. What time is it, Ferret?”

“Time?” he squeaked. “It’s about ten minutes until you become an exhibit at a museum instead of a zoo and I become a muff!”

“Enough theatrics, Ferret! I can’t see the clock!”

“Uh,” he peeked out from between a pair of rungs, “ten after two!”

“Perfect.”

And just as a burly hand turned over the chair, I launched myself into the curtain, pulling it and its fastenings down.

“AARGH!”

“MY EYES! MY EYES!”

“Run, Ferret!”

But he needed no encouragement.

---

“Mister Quill, I must commend you for your improvisation. I don’t believe even I have ever made use of celestial phenomenon as tool of defence, but I will now consider it an essential part of my arsenal.”


“Thank you, Mister Holmes. I confess to eavesdropping last week when you hosted that group of scientists.”

“Oh, the purloined telescope!” exclaimed Doctor Watson.

“It was the lens, my dear man, and the note-book of its inventor that was of most interest to the thieves, but, with our intervention, both were duly restored and the Royal Astronomical Society was duly grateful.”

“Although science informed the timing, I must say that the original idea came from literature.”

“How so?” asked Doctor Watson.

“My fellow countryman Mark Twain employed a similar device in one of his novels, A Yankee in the Court of King Arthur.”

“Fascinating. I must seek out a copy,” said Doctor Watson.

“Well, I’m just glad to have my co-star back,” said Ferret. “What would The Importance of Being Ferret be without Idyll Stoat?”

“He makes a much better thespian than he does a stole!” I agreed.

Ferret slurped his tea, gobbled down the last of the scones, brushed the crumbs from his fur, then rose. “Well, thanks to all. Must dash. Show’s got to go on, don’t you know? Would do to have one’s star…”

Mister Holmes, Doctor Watson, and I groaned, then spoke as one,

“Eclipsed.”

I hope that you’ve enjoyed this recounting of my latest adventure. And until next time, I remain,

Your humble servant,

Inky Quill

Date: 2017-08-21 04:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thesmallhobbit.livejournal.com
Another brilliant tale. And the perfect ending :)

Date: 2017-08-21 09:00 pm (UTC)
ext_1620665: knight on horseback (Default)
From: [identity profile] scfrankles.livejournal.com
I'd been assuming my birthday fic was the August entry, so it's lovely to get a bonus ^__^ (Realise now though, my birthday fic isn't a column, of course ^^")

My absolute favourite line is: “Time?” he squeaked. “It’s about ten minutes until you become an exhibit at a museum instead of a zoo and I become a muff!” ^___^

Date: 2017-08-21 09:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] debriswoman.livejournal.com
Excellent improvisation:-)
And some appropriate and frankly Franklesian word play.
Edited Date: 2017-08-21 09:46 pm (UTC)

Date: 2017-08-21 09:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] debriswoman.livejournal.com
I learn quite a lot from you, too:-)

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