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holmes_minor2016-09-14 04:08 pm
scfrankles.livejournal.com) wrote in holmes_minor2016-09-14 04:08 pm
Fic: The Seventh Stain: G
Title: The Seventh Stain
Form/Wordcount: 330 words
Characters/Pairings: Sherlock Holmes, Dr. Watson
Rating: G
Warnings/Content: N/A
Author’s Notes: “I have devised seven separate explanations, each of which would cover the facts as far as we know them." (COPP)
Holmes and Watson stared down together at the large maroon stain on the carpet. They exchanged a look, and then both straightened up again.
“So,” said Watson, “you have devised an explanation for this..?”
“Indeed.” Holmes smiled. “Seven of them in fact, dear boy.”
He began checking them off on the palm of his hand.
“Firstly, perhaps it isn’t a stain at all. Maybe it is merely the casting of a shadow. Or alternately, the surrounding part of the carpet has faded, making the unfaded part seem like a stain.”
Watson glanced down at the carpet doubtfully. “Yes..?”
Holmes tapped his palm again. “Perhaps varnish from the floorboards is seeping through.”
He gestured down at the stain.
“Or perhaps it’s an unfortunate reaction between the chemicals in the dye and certain acidic soils brought in on the soles of shoes. Or it’s the excretions of an infestation of insects!”
Holmes paused, tapping his palm thoughtfully.
“And now we get to the slightly more outlandish possibilities. Perhaps… a distant relative has passed by and attempted to paint an impressionistic mural on the carpet as a protest against not having received part of a substantial bequest.”
Watson shook his head. “Right...”
“And the final explanation is… a burglar has broken in. Barefoot and with purple feet, having come straight from his other licit occupation of grape-treader!”
Holmes beamed at Watson.
“So, what do you think?”
Watson frowned somewhat. “Well… I suppose they all seem… fairly… plausible.”
“Excellent!”
Holmes headed for the door of the room.
“Stay here, Watson. I shall just go and have a word with the lady of the house.”
Only a few minutes passed before Holmes returned, shoulders slumped and eyes downcast.
Watson regarded him sympathetically. “Things not progressing satisfactorily then, old fellow?”
“I’m afraid not.”
Holmes sighed heavily.
“Mrs. Hudson refused to swallow any of the explanations.”
He glared over at the stain.
“It appears this time I will have to pay for the carpet to be cleaned.”
Form/Wordcount: 330 words
Characters/Pairings: Sherlock Holmes, Dr. Watson
Rating: G
Warnings/Content: N/A
Author’s Notes: “I have devised seven separate explanations, each of which would cover the facts as far as we know them." (COPP)
Holmes and Watson stared down together at the large maroon stain on the carpet. They exchanged a look, and then both straightened up again.
“So,” said Watson, “you have devised an explanation for this..?”
“Indeed.” Holmes smiled. “Seven of them in fact, dear boy.”
He began checking them off on the palm of his hand.
“Firstly, perhaps it isn’t a stain at all. Maybe it is merely the casting of a shadow. Or alternately, the surrounding part of the carpet has faded, making the unfaded part seem like a stain.”
Watson glanced down at the carpet doubtfully. “Yes..?”
Holmes tapped his palm again. “Perhaps varnish from the floorboards is seeping through.”
He gestured down at the stain.
“Or perhaps it’s an unfortunate reaction between the chemicals in the dye and certain acidic soils brought in on the soles of shoes. Or it’s the excretions of an infestation of insects!”
Holmes paused, tapping his palm thoughtfully.
“And now we get to the slightly more outlandish possibilities. Perhaps… a distant relative has passed by and attempted to paint an impressionistic mural on the carpet as a protest against not having received part of a substantial bequest.”
Watson shook his head. “Right...”
“And the final explanation is… a burglar has broken in. Barefoot and with purple feet, having come straight from his other licit occupation of grape-treader!”
Holmes beamed at Watson.
“So, what do you think?”
Watson frowned somewhat. “Well… I suppose they all seem… fairly… plausible.”
“Excellent!”
Holmes headed for the door of the room.
“Stay here, Watson. I shall just go and have a word with the lady of the house.”
Only a few minutes passed before Holmes returned, shoulders slumped and eyes downcast.
Watson regarded him sympathetically. “Things not progressing satisfactorily then, old fellow?”
“I’m afraid not.”
Holmes sighed heavily.
“Mrs. Hudson refused to swallow any of the explanations.”
He glared over at the stain.
“It appears this time I will have to pay for the carpet to be cleaned.”
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Maybe he could ask a discount for quantity.
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